Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Story Time!

Okay, so I suppose it's normally a story then a nap... but who said I'm normal at all?

So anyway... Up to this point, our hero (that's me), has fallen deeply and madly in love with our beautiful, kind, charming princess (that's my Geekheart). At first he was rather reluctant, but after all, with mortal wounds like his, who could blame him? Eventually, though, our hero acknowledged his emotions and feelings for our heroine, and decided he fancied her enough to get married. I mean, after all, she was exactly what he wanted. He just didn't know it yet (sometimes [okay, most of the time] he's a little slow).

Well, after some conversation to make sure it was really possible, our Hero devised a cunning plan to win her heart forever. That plan requires the constant care and watchfulness of our Hero, basically forever. Part of that plan was marriage, and he had to convince the lovely princess to marry him. It wasn't enough to simply ask, our Hero is too much of a geek. So with a flash of inspiration he thought, "A hah! A treasure hunt!" and began working. When he was in Seattle he bought two sets of earrings, and then he bought her an engagement ring. In Seattle, he also worked on some rhyming clues to lead her around Maumelle. The plan was to finish with a nice walk across the Big Dam Bridge, (and a walk back), where he would propose halfway across. But as our hero planted the clues, he noticed something dark and frightening. There were people around! Now, our princess is a shy creature, with little desire to be paraded around. In some ways she's become less shy, thanks in part to our hero's lifestyle. But to propose in front of that many people? Our hero had strong feelings that this occasion should be personal and intimate — not shared with hundreds of other people, especially strangers!

So with a quick improvise, he decided to leave earlier in the day. At first this was not a problem. The first clue delivered, the second one was found (though it had prior been discovered by some goblins, they were confused as to its purpose and discarded it nearby the original hiding place), the third, too. Alas, on the fourth clue, some wind dragons must have spirited the clue away, for it was nowhere to be found. Luckily, our hero was able to read his original clue, which quickly lead our princess to the fifth. Here, disaster almost struck! Out of the grass on the side of the path slithered a black dragonlet in pursuit of some prey! Our princess froze, while our hero took up a defensive position. He offered to fight, but our princess commanded him to wait. The dragonlet froze, and examined our travelers from about twenty feet, and then cautiously turned to head back into the grass.

Upon searching for the fifth clue, it was nowhere to be found. Perhaps some hobgoblin, or even the dragonlet removed it, hoping to lure our travelers to some unknown fate. However, once again our hero had the original copy, and was able to direct our princess to the sixth, and final clue. It was here that disaster struck. Our hero neglected to factor in the heat of the sun at just past midday, and forgot to bring water. The sun beat down on our travelers, trying to force them to submit and give up. Heroically, they traveled on, step by weary step. Eventually they reached the sixth and final clue, but with no water and no shade, they stopped only briefly. Then they began the long journey back to the car. Wisely, they chose not to stop in the intended place (halfway across), but to head back to the car. When their transportation was in sight, our lovely princess ran to the car as fast as she could for the delicious water that awaited her. Then, our intrepid duo made their way to a restaurant, for what should have been a delicious repast.

However, when the nachos arrived, they tested the very fortitude of our weary travelers. For, instead of being covered with a delicious blend of bell peppers, tomatos, and onions, save one small shred of pepper, they were covered with a not-so-delicious blend of onions, with more onions. Our lovely princess does not like onions. Had they known the nefarious plot taking place in the kitchen, they never would have ordered their meal. Yet, stoically they ate. However, our hero was still faced with a dilemma! Where to ask the hand of our lovely princess? As yet there was no place suitable, either in temperature or beauty. Our travelers began home, stopping by the Mart of Wal, to purchase some food for their later meal back at the keep.

Just then, nature provided the answer to our hero's dilemma! It began to rain, cooling the earth and the air. With the excuse that he "just wanted to show [her] something quick", our hero was able to make a detour. It was a place he loved as a child, it had been complete forest back then, and now, sadly, it had been clear cut in preparation for the construction of other keeps. Yet it had a beautiful view of the abundant verdance, as yet, and so he stopped. Nervously, he made an excuse that got our princess from the coach, then fell to his knee and fumbled out a box. It contained the most beautiful ring, perfect for our princess. A dark blue sapphire jewel, ringed by small bits of diamond, set in white gold, it was truly magnificent. With another poem, our hero asked, "... will you be my wife?"

With a smile and tears in her eyes, the beautiful princess answered, "Of course I will!"

Making me the happiest man alive!

1 comment:

Dale said...

Ah, but thine epsitle is wrought with many questions and nary an answer is thither.

Of mine ownself, I dare not pose such simple queries. I then simply pose mine only query.

What is her side of this story? We want the truth!