Amazin' Fruit!

Okay, it's not fruit, but it is amazing.

What is, you ask?

Google Calendar! If I want to create something, all I have to do is say something like: "8am-2:30p Opening at Student center" and it automagically fills up the event 8-2:30, where: student center.

The format doesn't have to be that exact, either. Google usually gets it right, and that is awesome.

Chocolate!!!

So, as you can see, there isn't much to say. We made a chocolate cake, and it was FUN!!!! and yummy hehe

Disconnect

I left my phone at home today by accident. As a result, I've caught myself looking for my phone to check the time and for messages at least 3 times today. It's a weird experience to realize how dependent I am on that device. After walking across campus and noticing the various students who had headphones in their ears or a phone in their hands I kind of felt... dirty.

It was like I was watching people's secret lives, right there in front of me. Normally I'm in the cocoon of my own personal tech bubble, and thus able to ignore people in general. But I felt like a voyeur - I was on the outside, looking in and nobody knew it.

All because I left my phone at home.

Little Things

So, I'm laying here next to my sleeping Geekheart, listening to the rain come down like crazy. I went to sleep around 9 with my wife, and then I woke up at 10. So I've just been plinking around on here, listening to her breathe.

This morning I woke up and my left hand felt extremely naked and vulnerable. My wedding ring was gone and I couldn't find it anywhere. It wasn't in the bed, on the floor, on the bathroom counter where I leave it to take a shower... glumly I pulled my CTR ring out of my desk drawer - I may not be able to wear my wedding ring, but at least I can wear a ring on my wedding finger.

I was running late already, but I decided I should try and get us all to pray. So down we knelt, and under a piece of paper lay my ring! Elatedly I put it on, with the remembrance that last night I gave my wife a massage and took my ring off to keep it from getting all lotion-y. If we hadn't had family prayer, I may not have found my ring yet. I'll let you judge for yourself, but to me it was an affirmation that family prayer (and prayer in general) is a good thing (tm).

I love my wife.

Slacker 4.0

So life lately has been very lacking. Wayne and I have been terrible at doing the daily things that we know we need to do. We haven't been reading our scriptures, doing FHE, or studying the lesson for Sunday BEFORE sunday if at all. I have felt rather empty as of late and I think it is due to the lack of keeping our promises with Heavenly Father. Doing all of those things has gotten me this far. I have a wonderful and awesome husband a great family, and a testimony that is so strong. I am MAKING the time from now on. There are no exscuses and I know that. If there is one thing I learned from being on my own when my ex left me is that you are the one who has to make things happen. If you want to be sad then you will be. If you are going to do nothing but complain then your always going to be complaining and never able to listen and see what you need to do.
I have so much in me to give to people around me and I haven't been doing that nearly enough lately. I also haven't been taking very much care of myself. I am no good if I am not taking care of myself. So last night I finally exercised after about 3 weeks and it felt great.
There is a way to get around this and I think Wayne summed it up best when he said "Just do it!"
Thats exactly what I plan to do :)

Feeling Bleh

So, this week has been kinda blah. So was last week too. I exercised a little bit last week. I haven't done anything this week, I just haven't had any energy. I have been so aggravated with life lately. First it was taking forever to get the sellers on our soon to be house to agree on things that needed to be fixed. Then last night our realtor calls and the sellers have agreed to do all that we asked pretty much so now it's time for an appraisal ( more money out the pocket) and then I don't know what. Then my car crapped out and luckily the guy that sol it to us is willing to work with us. So for now we have this 92 Buick regal custom that is so Awful! I am not even kidding. Mark ( the car guy) knew I didn't like it so he is continuing in his search to find something better. AND.....Julia wants a baby. Yes! Thats right! I want a baby. I have the "Baby fever" So bad! I have never been this way before. Last night I went into WalMArt and there was this baby crying. Probably newborn from the way the cry sounded but my instincts kicked me in the gut or something I don't know what happened but I was darn near to tears listening to that baby cry. I was thinking I needed to go find this baby and calm it down. HELLO! Reality came slamming back into me though and I realised that probably wouldn't be the thing to do. SO anyways. Here I am, going through trials, missing my girls, not making enough money( probably never will), not getting enough sleep, not reading the scriptures the way I should, and not praying. I am SO ready for this coming reunion. I need to recharge!

Gratitude

So, for the past month or so I've been playing Mr. Mom. As the result of a simple Cost/Benefit analysis, it just made more sense for me to stay at home. I wasn't making what it would cost to have the girls at daycare, and then having them at daycare means both of us miss out on spending time with them and my travel time on top of that made it easy to see that Mr. Mom was the preferable option. And it's been a lot of fun.

However, at times it's been a bit of a struggle - for the both of us. For Julia, she hates being away from the girls. And at times the stresses of her job get to her. For me, trying to do all the things Daddy needs to do - whether it's cook and clean, getting kids dressed, trying to teach the kids correct principles... as well as be a husband - it's a lot of work. Then, too, there's a sense of fulfillment in providing for my family that I'm missing out on. I felt that way once - I had been working and Julia was off work for some reason or another. When I got home, she had cleaned a bit, and the girls were playing, and Julia was cooking dinner. I just had this deep feeling of "rightness". That this was how it should be. It's a difficult concept to communicate clearly, so you'll just have to pretend you know what I mean ^_^

Lately, though, I've felt like I've been slacking - I'm not able to get everything done around the house that I would like to/need to. And then when Julia gets home, she'll just randomly do something that would have taken me a while to get done, while she's doing something else. It makes me feel a little down on myself. For instance, the other day I cleaned the kitchen. Then I made some banana bread and it looked like I hadn't cleaned the kitchen in the first place. The very next day I took the girls out shopping and to give Grandpa his Father's Day gift, and got home, where Julia had cleaned the kitchen and had two loafs of banana bread in the oven - and the kitchen looked GOOD. Then last night when I was reading the girls some bedtime stories, she washed all the dishes in the time it would have taken me to wash some of them.

So I get this combination feeling of intense gratitude and worthlessness, because it feels like I'm not really contributing all that much.